Die Young
by KurohanaMaoi
Summary: John and Karkat are hanging out and then John asks Karkat what he would do if he died young.  God I suck at summaries.  And also genres.


Your name is Karkat Vantas, and somehow you have been dragged into the dumbass known as John Egbert's home. Movie Night time, he claimed. Fuck. You knew it would be another one of his stupid movies involving stupid plots and stupid human actors and other stupid things. He acted out the fighting scenes for you, but you simply didn't give a fuck. You _almost _gave a fuck but nope, not quite. So no fuck was given towards this monstrosity the humans' know as 'good cinema'. Nor will it ever be given towards anything involving this fuckass.

John stopped mid-scene, standing there with a hand on his chin. A small twitch pulled one of the sides of his usual derpy smile into a small frown, thinking of something obviously sad to him. He put his hands to his sides and plopped on the coach next to you. He turned his body towards you so that he faced you, and you decided to just glare at him until he said what was on his mind. It's not like you cared what was on his mind and what was about to come out of his mouth, you just decided to listen because you needed a distraction from this awful movie. Well you didn't pay attention enough to the movie to determine whether it was horrible or not, but you just assumed it was, being that it _is_ John we are talking about.

"Karkat...what would you do if I died young?" John questioned, his tone very light. You could hardly hear him, fuck, no one could be able to hear him anyway. He mumbled it. Your eyebrows furrowed a bit, trying to figure out what John said. Fuck, you were actually trying to give a fuck towards the question.

" What did you say? I couldn't fucking hear you," You asked, hopefully this time he'll speak up. He went up about a half a tone louder, not much of an improvement. You could barely make out what he said, but you think you caught most of it. The question sort of startled you, not really sure what you would do if he died young. John wasn't like some of the other fuckasses, he was...okay, you guess. God what are you saying now. Fuck...

You say the first thing that comes to mind. " I'd throw a fucking party," You said, rolling your eyes, not giving a fuck. John was not pleased with the answer you gave him. He wasn't furious or anything, but you seemed to dampen his mood further. He actually believed you. Oh how you wanted to smack that boy for thinking that you would actually throw a party if he died. But with the way you treat him, he may believe that you would. Oh fuck...you do seem to not care for his life at all. Though, in your heart, ew...you knew you sort of gave a fuck about him. You sigh heavily, trying to think of something to say to help the human's feelings. John was now in a slumped back position, twiddling his thumbs like a idiot with a frown in place of the usual smile, a smile you knew that you wanted to see. It just didn't seem natural to see him frown, like it wasn't natural for Gamzee to go without sopor slime and Terezi to stop collecting her scalemites and for- where are you going with this you need to get back on track. Oh, right, you were trying to think of something to say, but you were looking like a real fuckass with your mouth open yet nothing coming out.

**BE THE OTHER GUY**

Your name is John Egbert, and you feel like you have been kicked in the face. Your smile has disappeared from your face completely and you were thinking about what would happen if you died young. You had asked Karkat what he would do if you died young...you were expecting something like the answer he gave, but still, you feel like you are a little puppy and you were just kicked by some mean boy that lives across the street. You considered Karkat a friend, yet he would argue with that, so it hurt you when the answer was given. So much hurt. He didn't care if you died, great. Now you were seriously questioning your strange friendship.

You slumped back into the coach, trying to see if you could just disappear. Okay, maybe you were a overreacting the slightest because _one_ person said they'd throw a party if you died...but some others would gladly attend that party, right? Damn, now you think everyone doesn't care about your existence. You're questioning your life now. You continue to sink back, hopefully the coach would just grow a mouth and swallow you whole.

Boy, you are really taking this thing seriously.

" Do you hate me that much, Karkat?" you questioned, your voice cracking a tiny bit. It was hardly noticeable, but you were sure that Karkat would hear it.

**BE THE FUCKASS WHO JUST KIND OF BROKE THE HUMAN'S HEART**

Oh shit, you seriously do not know how to answer this poor boy. He seriously thinks you hate him. You act like you do but...let's face it, you like him just a smidge. You open your mouth to say at least something, yet all that comes out is a tiny little whimper. Fuck. You're whimpering. That's not good. And now John has a tear running down his face, the most pitiful look on his face. His big, blue eyes clouded with tears that he's trying to restrain but not working in the least bit. You have absolutely no clue how to react or anything. Gog are you becoming a big jackass. You were one before but you were kind of just acting so to speak, this time you didn't mean to be. Think now or else oh gog he's making little whimpering sounds because he's crying and its' not helping you and you feel horrible for some reason. Just say _something._

You clear your throat a bit, hoping it would help you think of something. Anything at this point would be valid. _Anything._ " John, stop crying," you start out in a harsher tone than you meant to. He wiped his face and sniffled a bit, looking you in the eyes. " Listen, I didn't mean what I said. Of course I wouldn't throw a fucking party because you fucking died. Fuck, I would probably...miss you," you say truthfully, just letting out whatever flowed into your think pan. He listened intently, hoping to hear more of what you had to say, which was nothing. Just make it up as you go, you figured you would do. " Yeah, I would miss you...I know it's not often you'll ever fucking hear that from a fuckass such as myself but it's true. Don't expect to hear that ever, or at least for a long while from now," you say, leaning back into the coach, crossing your arms across your chest. Yup, you were just making this _all _up. If someone say otherwise, their argument is invalid. Okay you can't even convince yourself that you were lying to him, you were lying to yourself saying that it's not true.

The smile that you've been wanting to return ever since this problem came about now has returned in full force. Sure, there were still a few sniffles here and there but he was considerably happier ever since you told him the truth. He's easily pleased and swayed, isn't he? He wrapped his arms around you and pulled you into a tight embrace. You decided not to fight it, just go with it but seem like you weren't enjoying it. Which you didn't. Yeah, not in the least. The hug lasted about 10 seconds before the boy let go, but it was just enough to make you smile for a half-second till the usual scowl returned.

" Since you asked me, I might as well fucking ask you the same. What would you do if I died young?" you asked him. You didn't expect much, the maximum most likely being to miss you for about a day then move on with his own life. You could tell John was thinking hard about it, that little furrowing of his eyebrows indicating that he was processing and computing and what not in that head of his. You tapped your fingers on the arm of the coach, impatiently waiting for his answer. Not that you cared. Okay yes you did care. Fucking hell stop confusing yourself already you're starting to feel things you've never felt before and gog it felt weird. Like a mix of pity AND hate at the same time. It was confusing you.

" Well, I'm not sure...I'd miss you so much, Karkat!" John exclaimed, frowning a bit. Oh gog oh shit not the frown again you can't deal with the frown. The frown only led to more crying and you don't want to see John cry. He looked ridiculous when he cried. His eyes got puffy and red, cried out clear tears unlike your tears which would turn out bright red, and he just didn't _look_ right when crying! It's not something you want him to do again, especially when you're the cause of him crying. Get your think pan BACK ON TRACK because John's mouth was moving now and you weren't paying attention.

" Karkat? You hear me?" John asked reassuring that you caught what he said. You shook your head no, crossing your arms across your chest. " I-it doesn't matter anyways...Let's just watch the movie!" John stuttered a bit, sort of sheepishly. You shrug and turn to the tv, continuing to watch the movie. John seemed to be back in his old mojo, resuming what he was doing before, acting out the fighting scenes. You couldn't help but have the tiniest, barely visible smile when you saw he was happy again. Hm, maybe you were possibly auspistice between John's normal, derpy, happy self and his depressed, saddened self. Probably not, but it was kind of a nice thought, fucking hell what is going on with you. You decided to ignore anything against it, because fuck, John was kind of built to make you feel pity at some point.


End file.
